Child Abuse Awareness Month
There are sadly too many abused kids around the world. It literally makes my heart hurt thinking about it. I'm thankful for some really great resources I've come across to help me equip my kids with information and tools to keep them safe.
All of these resources have at home and at school components to them. It would be great to see them being more widely used.
Pantosaurus Underwear Rule: PANTS
Preschool to Grade 1
Privates are private
Always remember your body belongs to you
No means no
Talk about secrets that upset you
Speak up, someone can help
This is a very interactive sexual abuse prevention program that has SO MANY resources for children, parents and teachers. Including an activity pack (by donation), an interactive app, free posters with small activities, in depth guide for parents and carers, tips on when to talk to your kids, lesson plan and teaching resources for schools.
The NSPCC is a British organization whose aim is to prevent child abuse. They have many more resources for kids of all ages:
Protect Yourself Rules - Unsafe Touches
Kindergarten to Grade 3
1. Shout, Run, Tell
2. Safe Touch, Unsafe Touch
3. Doesn't Matter Who It Is
4. Stranger Safety (I think it's okay to have small chitchat with strangers)
5. Hitting is Wrong
6. Tell a Grown-up
Barbara Sinatra Children's Center Foundation has a child abuse awareness and prevention campaign and I really like how they've separated their videos by age.
My main criticism during these videos is the emphasis that parents are safe adults. They didn't come right out in any of the videos and say that a parent might be the ones doing the unsafe touches, they kinda skirted around the issue. Talked about friends, family friends and mom's boyfriend but did say if someone at home hurts you or uses unsafe touch than to tell a teacher or school councillor.
Grade 4-6
1. Unsafe Touches
2. Hitting is Wrong
3. Doesn't Matter Who It Is
4. Smart Choices (online safety)
5. Tell an Adult
6. Stop, Walk, Tell (including bullying)
This group of videos addresses parents as a person who might hurt you, online safety, (cyber)bullying, and how to talk to friends you suspect are being hurt. I appreciated the emphasis throughout both sets of videos on being confused about these unsafe touches and how the abuser might try to embarrass you or buy you something so you won't tell.
What the videos/campaigns above lack (in my opinion) is some of the straight forward language I think is necessary to keep kids safe. I expect this is because they have been created for school use and using anatomical terms for body parts is not politically acceptable by all parents for kids at each stage of childhood. So I've found a resource (below) that really compels me to think critically about my role in parenting my kids and pushes me to do more.
7 Ways Parents can Protect Kids from Sexual Abuse
I found this article to be SO helpful in giving me concrete ways to keep my kids safe.
I've taken portions of the article and listed it out below:
1. Talk to your kids about sex, early and often
-teach proper anatomical terms
-Family Values About Sex checklist of questions
2. Teach kids about arousal.
-don't let them equate physical arousal with love
-give agency over their own bodies (no forced hugs/kisses)
3. Kids are never too old to talk about sex/abuse.
-talk to your teens
-dangers of older kids watching porn and experimenting with younger kids
4. Who is your kid spending time with?
-check in with your kid in detail after they've been alone with someone
-don't let them be in cars alone with someone they're spending a lot of time with
5. Know that Stranger Danger is a myth.
-people who abuse children look and act just like everyone else
6. Educate yourself on the signs of child sexual abuse.
-trauma manifests itself differently
7. Know the three words to say if a child tells you of abuse.
-"I believe you"
-don't interrogate them, get them to a professional
The article ends with this:
“The amount of courage it took to break the spell and seek help is nothing short of heroic.”
This leads directly into the last line from the Oprah interview of the men who were allegedly abused at the hands of Michael Jackson (documentary: Leaving Neverland) that I found SO illuminating. Oprah (a victim of child sexual abuse herself) said:
"While coming forward is often viewed as a betrayal to the perpetrator, in reality the biggest betrayal is to yourself. You have to betray yourself (and the lies and secrets you've created) in order to come forward. "
If someone ever tells you about the abuse they have experienced, start with "I believe you. You're so brave. Thanks for telling me." Then get them in to see a professional as soon as possible.
All of these resources have at home and at school components to them. It would be great to see them being more widely used.
Pantosaurus Underwear Rule: PANTS
Preschool to Grade 1
Privates are private
Always remember your body belongs to you
No means no
Talk about secrets that upset you
Speak up, someone can help
The NSPCC is a British organization whose aim is to prevent child abuse. They have many more resources for kids of all ages:
Protect Yourself Rules - Unsafe Touches
Kindergarten to Grade 3
1. Shout, Run, Tell
2. Safe Touch, Unsafe Touch
3. Doesn't Matter Who It Is
4. Stranger Safety (I think it's okay to have small chitchat with strangers)
5. Hitting is Wrong
6. Tell a Grown-up
My main criticism during these videos is the emphasis that parents are safe adults. They didn't come right out in any of the videos and say that a parent might be the ones doing the unsafe touches, they kinda skirted around the issue. Talked about friends, family friends and mom's boyfriend but did say if someone at home hurts you or uses unsafe touch than to tell a teacher or school councillor.
Grade 4-6
1. Unsafe Touches
2. Hitting is Wrong
3. Doesn't Matter Who It Is
4. Smart Choices (online safety)
5. Tell an Adult
6. Stop, Walk, Tell (including bullying)
What the videos/campaigns above lack (in my opinion) is some of the straight forward language I think is necessary to keep kids safe. I expect this is because they have been created for school use and using anatomical terms for body parts is not politically acceptable by all parents for kids at each stage of childhood. So I've found a resource (below) that really compels me to think critically about my role in parenting my kids and pushes me to do more.
7 Ways Parents can Protect Kids from Sexual Abuse
I found this article to be SO helpful in giving me concrete ways to keep my kids safe.
1. Talk to your kids about sex, early and often
-teach proper anatomical terms
-Family Values About Sex checklist of questions
2. Teach kids about arousal.
-don't let them equate physical arousal with love
-give agency over their own bodies (no forced hugs/kisses)
3. Kids are never too old to talk about sex/abuse.
-talk to your teens
-dangers of older kids watching porn and experimenting with younger kids
4. Who is your kid spending time with?
-check in with your kid in detail after they've been alone with someone
-don't let them be in cars alone with someone they're spending a lot of time with
5. Know that Stranger Danger is a myth.
-people who abuse children look and act just like everyone else
6. Educate yourself on the signs of child sexual abuse.
-trauma manifests itself differently
7. Know the three words to say if a child tells you of abuse.
-"I believe you"
-don't interrogate them, get them to a professional
The article ends with this:
“The amount of courage it took to break the spell and seek help is nothing short of heroic.”
This leads directly into the last line from the Oprah interview of the men who were allegedly abused at the hands of Michael Jackson (documentary: Leaving Neverland) that I found SO illuminating. Oprah (a victim of child sexual abuse herself) said:
"While coming forward is often viewed as a betrayal to the perpetrator, in reality the biggest betrayal is to yourself. You have to betray yourself (and the lies and secrets you've created) in order to come forward. "
If someone ever tells you about the abuse they have experienced, start with "I believe you. You're so brave. Thanks for telling me." Then get them in to see a professional as soon as possible.
Additional Resources:
Canadian Red Cross Child Abuse and Neglect Prevention (School) Programs with training and resources for teachers for kids at different ages.
Walking the Prevention Circle is a Red Cross program developed in partnership with First Nations, Métis and Inuit communities to educate adults living or working with First Nations/Inuit/Métis on how to recognize and prevent violence against children and youth.
An NSPCC list of books to read aloud with kids (in class or at home) and recommended reading for parents and carers and people working with children.
An NSPCC list of books to read aloud with kids (in class or at home) and recommended reading for parents and carers and people working with children.
Comments
Post a Comment