Emotional Side of Nursing pt. 2
E and I are done breastfeeding. Didn't really plan on weaning. It just seemed to be the obvious course ahead at the time. He's growing up.
Over a couple months (March-May 2015) we "weaned" from 2 feeds (before bed and first thing in the morning) to nursing just in the morning by his second birthday. We would miss a feed before he went to bed if we'd kept him up late. I was sick for bit. Sometimes he refused.
After we skipped a feed enough times, and he seemed fine - I was fine. I decided to think about the end of breastfeeding. And something happened. I started appreciating my time nursing toddler E more. Every time I fed him, I was in the moment. I realized it could be the last time we nursed (especially as he refused it more and more).
I got teary eyed occasionally. Which I didn't think I would. I got Andrew to take a couple photos so I could remember our snuggle time in the mornings.
By early July my supply seemed to be dwindling. And sometimes when Little E fed it would be a little painful - in the "my milk's coming in" kind of way. Andrew and I had a trip planned to Mexico at the end of they month for a friend's wedding and Little E was going to Granni and Papa's. So it seemed like a natural time to stop breastfeeding.
We had decided when we first started giving Little E cow's milk at a year, that he would only drink it out of a cup (not a bottle), and I knew I couldn't pump enough for him to have a bottle every morning we were away (6 mornings) in July.
So the morning before we left. I took a deep breath, nursed him, gave extra snuggles. Sang some songs, smiled into his eyes, smelled his cute head, kissed his forehead repeatedly. Did all the mama things. And that was it.
When we came home, we kept the same morning routine of snuggles in our bed. Little E asked to nurse (pointed at my breast and said "Please", which he had never done before) just twice. I nicely said, "Sorry, sweetie. I love you." And then would redirect and sing songs, snuggle or tickle. And that was it. No crying.
From an unsure beginning, to breastfeeding success, to the end - breastfeeding (and all it's transitions) was not what I expected. It was hard, good, boring, convenient, a positive bonding time, a nuisance. But I'm glad we (as a family) did it. And I'm glad we did it as long as we did.
Over a couple months (March-May 2015) we "weaned" from 2 feeds (before bed and first thing in the morning) to nursing just in the morning by his second birthday. We would miss a feed before he went to bed if we'd kept him up late. I was sick for bit. Sometimes he refused.
After we skipped a feed enough times, and he seemed fine - I was fine. I decided to think about the end of breastfeeding. And something happened. I started appreciating my time nursing toddler E more. Every time I fed him, I was in the moment. I realized it could be the last time we nursed (especially as he refused it more and more).
I got teary eyed occasionally. Which I didn't think I would. I got Andrew to take a couple photos so I could remember our snuggle time in the mornings.
We had decided when we first started giving Little E cow's milk at a year, that he would only drink it out of a cup (not a bottle), and I knew I couldn't pump enough for him to have a bottle every morning we were away (6 mornings) in July.
So the morning before we left. I took a deep breath, nursed him, gave extra snuggles. Sang some songs, smiled into his eyes, smelled his cute head, kissed his forehead repeatedly. Did all the mama things. And that was it.
When we came home, we kept the same morning routine of snuggles in our bed. Little E asked to nurse (pointed at my breast and said "Please", which he had never done before) just twice. I nicely said, "Sorry, sweetie. I love you." And then would redirect and sing songs, snuggle or tickle. And that was it. No crying.
From an unsure beginning, to breastfeeding success, to the end - breastfeeding (and all it's transitions) was not what I expected. It was hard, good, boring, convenient, a positive bonding time, a nuisance. But I'm glad we (as a family) did it. And I'm glad we did it as long as we did.
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